Am I doing with myself right now? I don’t know. Phone is off. Computer is about to go off. I’m going to revel in complete silence without any interruption. I don’t NEED to know the answers right now. I just NEED to get through another day and I’ll figure the rest of this bullshit out some other time. Maybe tommorow. Maybe not. But for now - I’m zoning out.
“Unless it’s mad, passionate, extraordinary love, it’s a waste of your time. There are too many mediocre things in life; Love shouldn’t be one of them.”
— Dream for an Insomniac
Honestly I do.
I always end up being the girl that everyone takes advantage of, because well, I am way too nice. I think that maybe- just maybe I’ve found someone who deserves everything I am willing to give him without second guessing. He’s kind, caring, and honest. He takes care of me when he doesn’t have to. He introduces me to new things, places, ideals, and culture. He makes me want to be a better person, to be motivated, not for him, but for myself. He is real. He’s not a child, already has a mom, and treats me like I haven’t been treated in a LONG TIME. I see things in the future - and for once it doesn’t scare the shit out of me. I see myself building a life with him, sharing my life with him, and ultimately having a best friend. I want to be the best girlfriend I possibly can for him. He deserves it. He deserves all the best things life has to offer, and I want to be one of those things.
come out and playyyyyyy
You are an astronaut - Describe your perfect day.
“I don’t know if I will have the time to write anymore letters, because I might be too busy trying to participate. So if this does end up being the last letter, I just want you to know that I was in a bad place before I started high school, and you helped me. Even if you didn’t know what I was talking about or know someone who has gone through it, you made me not feel alone. Because I know there are people who say all these things don’t happen. And there are people who forget what it’s like to be 16 when they turn 17. I know these will all be stories someday. And our pictures will become old photographs. We’ll all become somebody’s mom or dad. But right now these moments are not stories. This is happening, I am here and I am looking at her. And she is so beautiful. I can see it. This one moment when you know you’re not a sad story. You are alive, and you stand up and see the lights on the buildings and everything that makes you wonder. And you’re listening to that song and that drive with the people you love most in this world. And in this moment I swear, we are infinite.”